Barca 4, Valladolid 1, a.k.a. the “Flatter to Deceive” edition, a.k.a. “And then there were four”

By: Isaiah | March 23rd, 2008

Four points, baby! Four. Freakin’. Points. Kevin in the house again for Isaiah, wanting to wait until after the Evil Empire/Valencia match to post this match report, so that I could say, once again:

Four. Freakin’. Points.

Ray Hudson cracked me up with his “man of the match” debate, as if there could be any doubt. No, not Krkic or Iniesta, but Yaya. I know, I know. He didn’t score a single goal, though he came very close with his rocketblast of a free kick. But look at what happened after he left the game: two blasts off the woodwork and a goal called back for offside for Valladolid.

Yaya was everywhere, making passes, including a beauty to Xavi, starting the offense from the back and, in the midfield, hanging out the sign that read “Closed. Please get that crap outta here.” He was moving much better today, and played like a one-man wrecking crew. Yee-ha. And when he’s on, nobody has to play out of position to cover for someone else, because he is always in control. He makes a more offensive-minded player such as Sylvinho possible, and frees up Iniesta to go forward and be brilliant. Same for Xavi.

I know that it used to be a full-on man crush, but I might become a stalker. And this, with back and abdominal injuries? Sorry, what is ailing Ronaldinho again? Just asking. It’s pretty hard getting a pedicure appointment in Barcelona. Maybe Sunday was the only day available. It’s hard being a superstar, so shut up, everyone.

Seriously, the Ronaldinho thing is a bad situation. Hurt or not, who knows? But never mind that, because we’re here to exult….sort of.

This could as easily have been a loss. We got the luck that the Evil Empire used to get. They would have won that Valencia match earlier in the season, and we would have lost this one. But we didn’t, and….how you say in your country? Neener, neener.

Ball movement was exquisite, movement off the ball was exquisite, until it wasn’t. This game should have been like layup drills for a scorer who has lost his touch. Start small, and re-learn how to kick out the jams. But it became more difficult than it should have been. Anyone wondering about the value of Yaya, and why the man crush is in full effect here, needs to watch the match from when Gudjohnsen was subbed in for Yaya. Completely different. Suddenly, the back line looked old and slow, Valdes looked….but hey, his trunk waistband was as lofty as ever, and you know what? We WON!

Credit Valladolid for a plucky performance. Were it not for their keeper, and some unfortunate finishing in the first half, it would have been 4 or 5-0 before the second half even started. Asenjo played a great match, but was overcome by class, style, and a young’un named Krkic.

This was the match that we saw the promise, the bright, shining future that makes us (well, me anyhow) ready to put that price tag on Ronaldinho’s head. Imagine an assault line of Iniesta, Messi, Krkic and Eto’o coming at you? No dithering, no fooling about. Krkic plays precisely the kind of direct, incisive, smart football that is its own type of joga bonito.

I thought that when he missed those first-half chances that this was going to be a loooong day for him, but he picked himself up and kept on rolling. Krkic was spectacular today. Hope Dos Santos was watching the kid’s very grown-up display of football.

But alas, I only have one man crush to give, and not being a member of the International Man-Boy Love association, Yaya it is.

Xavi was also rocking the house today, as was the offense in general, when they weren’t mucking about with the ball. Henry, Eto’o and Krkic, all killers inside the box, makes us extremely difficult to defend. They all have ball skills, great shots and a knack for being in the right place at the right time.

Pretty tough for a Valladolid side that for a while, showed zero interest in attacking, or trying to do anything except leave with what they came in with. A point. That first goal changed everything, and opened up the match.

Yes, we were supposed to win, and we did. And the lead to the Evil Empire is now four points. Villarreal also won, so they are right behind us. But I am flush with confidence. Hopefully, we learned the value today of bright, active football, and will go forth and multiply.

And what a great weekend of footy, by the by. The most excellent Juventus/Inter match, today’s intense Arsenal/Chelsea outing, then the La Liga goodness. I’m tired. Nap time.

And with that, player ratings:

Valdes: 2. Dude, what the hell were you thinking about this match? Nothing? Just checking.
Zambrotta: 3. Rumor was that he was on the field, though he picked it up big-time in the second half. And he didn’t cost us goals, which is half the battle, as ballbeav would argue.
Thuram: 4. What a pro. He doesn’t have the physical skills that he once did, but smarts and great positional play make up for it….almost. If he leaves the elbow down, no penalty.
Puyol: 3. A curious game for Captain Courageous. Practical and quiet, but below standard.
Sylvinho: 6. When he plays like that, it makes Abidal hard to argue for. Beautiful passing, and very active in the defense. Hardly put a foot wrong the whole match.
Xavi: 6. Hell, yeah. THIS is the Xavi I like to see: strong with the ball, active, and what passing. That little flick to Krkic for the first missed scoring chance was exquisite.
Yaya: 8. He looked much better today, and played like it. He was everywhere, and his departure completely changed the match defensively for us. His pass into the box for the goal, that little lift, was perfect.
Iniesta: 8. Wow. He was a lion on offense and defense, showing Krkic how to stab a ball into an open net. He was all passes, runs and energy, and spare a thought for his durability, as well. Has he missed any time this season?
Krkic: 8. All day and all night. Even though he missed those two beauties early, his passing, running and shooting were exceptional. The way he just seems to materialize in the right spot dazzles. His holdup and pass for the Eto’o goal had me swooning.
Eto’o: 5. High energy, and that split-legged volley shot for his goal was slicker than snake snot.
Henry: 5. Motion, motion, motion. And what a pass to Xavi for that scoring chance.

Substitutes:
Gudjohnsen: 4. Didn’t have a lot of effect, just nice, solid play.
Abidal: 4. Ditto. Nice and solid. He and Sylvinho have some sorting out to do.
Pedrito: Incomplete. But he does have an earnest face.