Alves Doesn’t Care For Your Silly Rules [Updated]

By: Isaiah | December 11th, 2008

Rules in soccer are beneath Dani Alves. He does not practice with a balls or by running. Gonzalo Higuain, you should stay on the other side of the field from our Donatello unless you want cleaved in half:

[Update]
This just in, he’s serious:

Category: Nonsense

Tags: Dani Alves, Nonsense

« Yaya: Bigger Than You | Home | The Cule Dictionary »

Subscribe   The Offside RSS Feeds

Print

Share

Comments  

• Hawk |  December 11th, 2008 at 7:52 am

  
  
  

  Sweet.
  30 million just for that.

  Posted from Armenia

  

• pep |  December 11th, 2008 at 7:57 am

  
  
  

  Apparently our banderillero is preparing to fight a really big bull this weekend…

  http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/33/Banderillero.JPG

  Posted from Belgium

  

• Isaiah |  December 11th, 2008 at 8:02 am

  
  
  

  The only bull that big is Yaya. And Alves knows better than to take him on.

  Posted from United States

  

• eklavya |  December 11th, 2008 at 8:29 am

  
  
  

  alves vs yaya that would make a good fight xD, lol just kidding

  Posted from Switzerland

  

• Hawk |  December 11th, 2008 at 8:47 am

  
  
  

  Alves vs Yaya!
  Gladiator vs Beast!
  Alves could outrun Yaya, but eventually would be cornered
  and then ripped to shreds.
  Better keep Yaya chained then released on Raul or Higuain.

  Posted from Armenia

  

• Isaiah |  December 11th, 2008 at 9:11 am

  
  
  

  I like Dani Alves too much to put him through that…Definitely better to Yaya (it’s a verb, people) Raul, Higuain, and Guti. And don’t think Yaya can’t handle 3 players at once.

  Posted from United States

  

• Muhammad |  December 11th, 2008 at 9:16 am

  
  
  

  who would challenge the formidable cosmic brutal raw power that YAYA is to try to shackle him?
  abidal+puyol+keita+alves would not stand a chance, let alone alves alone

  Posted from United States

  

• Isaiah |  December 11th, 2008 at 9:35 am

  
  
  

  I think that Yaya, like a conscious werewolf, is willing to allow them to chain him up, for everyone’s benefit. I just wonder what kind of chains can hold him.

  Posted from United States

  

• tomatutomate |  December 11th, 2008 at 10:00 am

  
  
  

  Actually I heard that YaYa doesn’t practice that he a just summoned by Puyol right before the game. By rubbing the the captains armband.

  Posted from United States

  

• tomatutomate |  December 11th, 2008 at 10:02 am

  
  
  

  And if I heard wrong, I heard the gains are made out of reinforced andominium ( wolverine ).

  Posted from United States

  

• Isaiah |  December 11th, 2008 at 10:17 am

  
  
  

  adamantium, tomatutomate — but it’s got to be like cosmic adamantium…

  Posted from United States

  

• Muhammad |  December 11th, 2008 at 10:20 am

  
  
  

  that’s another interpretation of the story.. I’ve heared that YAYA skinned wolverine alive and then took his reinforced andominium and kept chewing it until it was liquid then injected it in.

  Posted from United States

  

• Muhammad |  December 11th, 2008 at 10:32 am

  
  
  

  ..and then YAYA burnt wolverine and from the ashes summoned puyol.. but that was in times before times.. their powers (equal to normal humans souls)reincarnated into many different shapes till it was embodied in these current human shape… from dinosaurs to lions and from hippos to octopuses.. and it’s believed that they will never end until the reverse of the big bang (originally caused by the basic embodiment of YAYA)happens.

  Posted from United States

  

• Isaiah |  December 11th, 2008 at 10:34 am

  
  
  

  wow. Muhammad…damn. I can’t top that.

  Posted from United States

  

• Muhammad |  December 11th, 2008 at 10:58 am

  
  
  

  thanks. But i just copied it from wikipedia.

  Posted from United States

  

• Isaiah |  December 11th, 2008 at 11:15 am

  
  
  

  Wikipedia is so cool.

  Posted from United States

  

• tomatutomate |  December 11th, 2008 at 11:27 am

  
  
  

  Thanks Isaiah for the clarification.

  Posted from United States

  

• Hawk |  December 11th, 2008 at 11:43 am

  
  
  

  Yaya (Ya’Ya’) > Yayaed, Yaya 1. To dominate completely and utterly; Not allowing to express one’s skills in football by closely marking and tackling. 2. To terrify with physical dominance.

  e.g. Raul was Yayaed during El Classico and was not able to influence the game.

  Posted from Armenia

  

• Hawk |  December 11th, 2008 at 11:44 am

  
  
  

  That was in my dictionary.

  Posted from Armenia

  

• Isaiah |  December 11th, 2008 at 12:04 pm

  
  
  

  I think we have the same dictionary, Hawk.

  Posted from United States

  

• andrew |  December 11th, 2008 at 5:15 pm

  
  
  

  jesus christ you guys have me in hysterics

  Posted from United States

  

• Alex |  December 12th, 2008 at 2:00 am

  
  
  

  Yes. These are the posts I like to read from you. Damn the numbers.

  Posted from United States

  

Comments are closed